A woman who was a member of my local AP group and community died suddenly on Thursday from a pulmonary embolism. She left a husband and two small children (3years and approx 18 months). She was pregnant with their third child. Her husband came home from work to his three old stating that "Mommy hasn't talked to me all day."
This is just so horribly tragic to me. A young family torn apart. The girls may never remember their mother. A husband has two small children to parent without his wife. How did he handle their night wakings last night. The youngest was still breastfed. How is she doing? How did they try to explain to the older child what had happened and why her mommy hadn't responded to her all day.
It just makes me reel. What would happen to my family? How would Dave cope? Who would help? How would be children remember me and adapt to life without me?
Although I am biased as a mother, I truly feel that the mother is often the cornerstone of the family. This is especially true with young children. What happens when that cornerstone is gone?
I've known people who have lost their cornerstone early in life (my dad's mom when he was 2, his brother was 8 months old), and as a young man (Alan was 19 when his mom died). I think it's like a pin ball machine flipper. You are going in one direction and then suddenly your whole life is hit and spinning off in an entirely new direction. And sometimes it's so sudden and you are going so fast that everything is out of control. We all have moments like that. Moments when someone dies, gets sick, does something that hurts you, or falls in love with you that can change you forever. Until another flipper comes along.
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