Resurfacing

I am surprised to find out how hard it is to carve out time for this space. How the more I am away, the harder it is to return. October was a blur and sped quickly into November. We were gone for three weeks in November visiting family and friends in Michigan and Ohio. I wrote several posts, but somehow they never saw the light. Now we find ourselves in December with the year end quickly approaching. And I realize I need to write here. Actually I want to write here and keep a record of our lives, but it is tough to return. So, over the next few days I will try to get those posts from November to upload and move forward with the everyday magic of our lives.

(These are photos from our return to Arizona last weekend. We drove back to Arizona right after Thanksgiving. After a too quick stop in Nebraska to visit two of my uncles, we sped home. We encountered a bit of snow and even dense fog, but the driving was rather easy (or so it seemed - Dave does all of the driving while I knit and entertain). Utah was especially beautiful with snow and frost covering the trees. It made the whole landscape look a bit like underwater coral.)

Happy Mother's Day

This weekend I had a chance to hear a good friend read a piece of her work at the annual Mothers Who Write Mother's Day reading. It was so refreshing to see her and listen to her story. It was also fantastic to hear the other authors read their work. Some pieces brought tears to my eyes, while others made me laugh. All made me think about this space and my own writing.

I haven't been writing at all during the last few weeks. Admittedly I am still a rabid list maker, but my mind has been cluttered with other thoughts and worry. During this time we have had adventures and celebrations - my oldest is now a bona fide double digit kiddo. I just haven't thought to document it or anything else. My mind usually flush with words, thoughts and ideas has been quiet. It has been consumed with the worries of buying a new home, redefining a few dreams and charting our family's course. As these thoughts seem to be falling into place a bit better over the past few days, I have realized how much I miss my journaling here. I am reminded of how this blog helps me focus on what I want for my family. It is a place to recall our life and the little things that bring us together.

Where I've been...

Almost a month without a post here. Of course, we have been busy, but it has been more. Initially I was thrown by the events in Connecticut. How to return to this space with tales of our creations and adventures with such sadness overshadowing the world? I wondered how such a thing could happen. Why children? What went wrong? How did we as a society fail? Is it guns? Is it mental health? It just seemed to be too much. So, I held my babes close, and we lived each day embracing our amazing life. Then it became more. We were busy. I was busy. Being present was the foremost thought in my mind. So, I stayed away. I wasn't sure how to return and plus, we were having so much fun.

We continued to make gifts for those close to us. We ventured into the making of salves and lip balm. I knit a last minute small animal gift for my youngest nephew, who has a penchant for putting things in his mouth (I realized the already wrapped watercolor peg people would not be good for him. I figured his parents would not like finding him with a stained mouth and tongue even if I assured them the products were non-toxic!). Aine made pipe-cleaner jewelry and other amazing gifts, while Eamon practiced and performed a dance as his gift.

We spent a lot of time with friends too. Eamon taught a Japanese marbling class to a small homeschooling group of friends. We celebrated Solstice with our homeschooling community. Our large group gathered to share gifts of the heart with one another in a festive celebration of gift-giving, food and laughter.

Our family welcomed a new nephew/cousin into the mix and heard tales of a new niece to arrive later this year. We tried capturing a multi-generational photo much to the disapproval of the three year old in the group. We went on a hike and took many bike rides. And we had, to quote my children, "the best Christmas ever." (more on that later!)

So now the New Year is upon our family, and we have many more adventures ahead. I am not sure where this year will take us, but I know we will be together enjoying one another and carving our path with laughter and fun.

Home again, home again

After more than six months and over 14,000 miles, our little family is back in Arizona. We arrived late Monday night tired and road worn. Our adventure has been fantastic, but it is nice to be back. We are spending our reentry together stretching out, shooting hoops, playing some wii, getting haircuts, knitting, reading and preparing to resume our normal life. Sorry about the onslaught of posts. They didn't upload for some reason while we were traveling. Give us a few days to relax as I am sure more adventure awaits us.

We love

Sometimes I get scared of all the what-ifs in life. Most of them are far from real, but they can occupy my mind. The workings of my imagination can spiral. I like to plan for the unexpected, so I create various what-if scenarios.

These what-ifs have become more visible where we live. Police officers are stationed outside the metro stops. We walk by men armed with some type of huge gun meant to kill many as we purchase our smart cards for the bus and train. Memorials are erected to those who fought and served or those just caught in the melee.

My children do not know about 9-11. We don't watch the news. I shield them from the horrors of fighting and war as well as the random violence people perpetuate against each other. Why must they know? They  are young and unclouded by such things. And then we walk by evidence of fear in our new town. My inquisitive young girl asks why there are so many guns. What is that rumpled piece of steel with the plaque for? Why? I find it so hard to explain to the small people that accompany me around town. How do I explain the craziness that can happen when I cannot understand it.

So instead I make plans. We focus on all the good and see the mysteries around us. We talk about fear and the idea of safety. We love.

Customer Service

I am a sucker for good customer service. When newly married, I shopped exclusively at Safeway for quite awhile due to their amazing customer service. Their employees would help you with anything. What do you need? Let me find that for you. At times I was afraid to ask for something, because I was sure they were running to their cars to find it at the nearby store!

I continue to be lured by good customer service. The way a customer is treated will keep them as your customer. Often businesses forget that I can walk away and spend my money elsewhere. Small businesses seem to know this. My husband frequents the same bagel shop at home because it is independently owner and the owner is now his friend. Why? Because the staff took the time to remember my husband and greet him. Such simple things.

Recently after receiving the replacement computer, I realized my iTunes was now empty. Not a big deal at first. Due to my buying history through Apple, I could easily replace those items. The piece missing, though, were our audiostories. At the end of last year I signed our family up for Sparkle Stories. My children really enjoy these tales. Initially I was just going to subscribe for the $1 trial month. I figured that would be enough. Nope. My kiddos wanted more, so we have continued our subscription and even given the subscription as a gift to family. Now the stories were gone.

I contacted Lisabeth at Sparkle Stories to see if there was any way to retrieve them. She quickly and kindly replied. Yes, she could help. After a few days, she sent me a file with all 24 missing stories!! This was a huge task for her, and she did it with aplomb. This morning, I downloaded the files, and we now have our complete set again. My kiddos will be so pleased when they find out.

Why am I telling you this? It all boils down to customer service. If she had scoffed and told me tough luck, I would have understood. It was a big request. However, she told me she thought she could help and did. She was prompt with her replies and helpful. I do hope her family business continues to flourish and expand. We do love the stories and now the company.

(the photos have nothing to do with Sparkle Stories-the kiddos took these yesterday)

These Days

Amidst the boxes and a new bit of uncertainty (including a possible change of plans), these days we are loving:

* playing Pokemon with one another. With a little tutelage, I am playing too. I even have my own deck.
* these cards. They utilize the Pokemon model, but deal with the natural world (think Kingdom, Phyllum, Genus). I found out about them on this site which is full of great science fun for children. Roberta also has a few other science and literary blogs. I get a lot of non-fiction book ideas from her.
* the Holden shawl that I finished several weeks ago. I washed and blocked all our woolens before packing, since little pests love dirty wool. The Holden shawlette was included in the soak. I like how it turned out, but I don't love it on me. It deserves to be loved, so I will add it to my gift-giving basket.
* a little time to knit. I have found a few moments here and there to knit the body of my Bedford pullover. Despite my most convincing efforts, it was deemed too short by everyone I asked, so I had to knit several more inches. I vow to start the sleeves today.
* all the space in our play area and the small selection of toys. I firmly believe that less is so much more when it comes to stuff. Even with what I consider a smaller amount of toys, getting rid of most of them makes playing with what is left so much fun.
* time spent with friends at the robotic competition. Eamon loved his outing to watch the big brother of one of his buddies compete. It was similar to a sporting event with costuming, cheering and major crowd participation. (The older brother's team made it to the finals, but was eliminated).
* friends who offer diversions each day for our family as well as invite the kiddos over to play.
* one more day of the weekend to spend together.

What are you loving today? Do you have any grand plans for the upcoming week?

You Could Call it That

A chilly wind blows against the bags as I lift them into the car. A wind unexpected in March here in the Southwest. Too small clothes, toys no longer needed, and other household items of little interest fill the bags and surrounding area. I hop into the drivers seat and head off. As I pull around to the back of the building, I notice the forbidding closed door. Checking the hours posted, I climb out hoping to deliver my unused items into the hands of those who could use them. No answer at the door despite the time. With the wind chilling my bare legs, I hustle to the front and ask the kind workers where I can leave my treasures. One promises to meet me in the back. We chat as I unload all I have to offer. "Spring cleaning, eh?" she quips as I ask for a receipt. I look at her, thinking about our journey ahead, all the packing, purging and planning and decide to leave it at that. Spring cleaning? Sure, you could call it that.

I'm Back

With much anticipation, I picked up my repaired laptop. The damage was covered by our insurance, which lessened the financial blow significantly. It now has a new battery, display, logic board, connector and plug. It works so well!

While I was without "my machine," I did not post much. We have a desktop computer, but it didn't feel right. I am now catching up with our life documenting. When I started this blog 6 years ago, I wanted it to serve as my memory. I noticed I was forgetting much of the little moments. It is hard to believe I have written about our life for so long. Initially I restricted access to family, but opened it up when members of our extended family could not read it (password issues). Once I opened the blog I included more of what we do. I am so glad I do. This little place helps me remain centered. It reminds me of what is truly important in our lives. As someone who doesn't scrapbook, I appreciate this space. It is a journal and record. It is our life.

(Holiday ornaments and gift tags that we finally painted. They were very brittle and did not withstand handling well, so they were not used at the holidays. They are now all broken except for the one given to Pap).

Stretch

I never mentioned my word for 2012. I reflected a bit at the beginning of the year on my previous year's resolve. I did fairly well on my goals, but I knew I wanted something different for 2012. This year seems big. So full of potential. I wanted to fully embrace it. So my word for 2012 is s t r e t c h.

I am trying to really challenge myself and my comfort zone this year. This applies to everything I do. I want to extend my boundaries in my craft, my love, my fears, my hopes. This expansion and stretching feels so good. I have challenged myself physically and mentally already this year. I have more complex, detailed knitting patterns selected as well as lofty goals in other areas. I can feel the old boundaries slip away as I s t r e t c h.

Of course, a true challenge emerged recently and put my word to the true test. Last week we found out that Dave has an opportunity to work out of state for several months. It will be a temporary assignment through his employer. The two of us decided it would be a grand adventure. We discussed if it could work and how it would work. I knew we could stretch and do it, so our family will be moving temporarily across the country. EEK! This is very far out of my comfort zone. I love adventure and new things, but I like a plan and the safety of the known. s t r e t c h


So in the next few weeks, we are putting everything we own into storage and embarking on a new journey. We will be living in a grand city with so much to do and see. It will be fantastic. We will be encountering a different climate complete with obvious seasons. We will need jackets and good walking shoes. We will be driving 37 hours to arrive at our destination. We will be seeing, doing and learning so much. It is a bit scary. But it will be a good s t r e t c h.

As I clamor to secure moving boxes, remove obligations and simplify our lives, I will continue to keep everyone posted on our preparations and adventures. This will be amazing, and I want you all to join us. Can you feel the s t r e t c h?

Full of Greatness

Last night, Aine spent the night with her Grandma. I don't know what they did yet, but I know Aine was beyond excited. She called Grandma a few weeks ago requesting a date day. She was very specific that she wanted to spend time with her grandmother by herself and spend the night. It was fine if GrandDad was there, but none of her cousins or siblings. We arranged a time with Grandma, and Aine has been counting the days.

With Aine out visiting, Dave and I were able to spend time with the boys. After a long day Benton fell asleep very early, so we were down to just one child. It was so nice eating a late dinner together with only Eamon. We were able to just focus on him and really listen. He talked and talked and talked a bit more. The topic was Minecraft, of course. We talked about his favorite things to do on the game. He taught me a bit more about the new update that was recently released. Dave added his insights into the game. It was fantastic.

During the discussion I asked how many people play the game. Dave asked Eamon if he remembered. The figure is around 3.5 million people. I was astonished. Minecraft is a game that no large software company would have made, yet it is a fantastic game with a huge following. It was developed initially by a single developer in the course of 7 days. His name is "Notch," and Eamon thinks he is pretty cool. Notch now owns his own company, employs 6 or 7 people and is a multi-millionaire. It is estimated that his game made around $33 million dollars. I find this phenomenal as he did not have the backing of a major software publishing company or advertising and the game sells for around $10-13.

This discussion about the creator of Minecraft led to talk about knitting. Ravelry started when a couple(Casey and Jess) had an idea to create an online forum for fiber artists which also included methods for organizing and storing information about tools, patterns, yarn, etc. It is now a business which employs other people and is huge in the fiber community. It is also a platform for new knitwear designers to gain attention and market their wares. I just read about one of these knitwear designers online on a great blog I follow. She has published 10 designs and is only 13. And her designs are good. Casey, Jessica and Lily found something that excited them and are pursuing it just as Notch is pursuing his passion.

Dave and I then turned to thoughts of what our passions might be. What truly drives us and brings us happiness. What would we do if time and money were not factors. Eamon added bits and pieces to the talk. The three of us talked about finding what you really like and following that for success. We really want our children to know themselves, find their passions and enjoy what they do. To have the freedom to accomplish this feat is a great gift. If this happens, I know I will have done a good job.

So, now I am thinking and ruminating. What do I love to do? What skills do I have? What is my contribution? I have ideas and I think I am much closer to an answer than I was several years ago. I am more comfortable with who I am and continue to learn and expand my knowledge daily. I think reading and knowing about others who have followed and shared their greatness on many different levels has helped. We are full of opportunity, I just need to figure out how to find my greatness and share it.

Today, ask yourself, am I doing what I love in some part of my life? What is your greatness. (Share it if you want. I would love to know!)

A Good Reminder

My mom's mom was handy. My grandma could saw the legs off a dining table and make it into a level coffee table in one cut. She would sew quilts for her grandchildren with a sewing machine that she tinkered with herself. She crocheted blankets. She took apart and fixed the washing machine while standing in ankle deep water (I won't mention that the machine was still plugged in). She cooked for a family of eight and still enjoyed cooking for her grandchildren. She knew how to refinish furniture, resurrecting old pieces that had been cast-off by others. She would grab a paintbrush and add color to walls as well as canvases. She did what needed to be done or was at least willing to try.

Whenever I visit my parents I am reminded of my grandma. I recall her willingness to try, and of her creativity. My mom has several things in her home that my grandmother made. The coffee table mentioned above sits in front of their couch. Several of my grandmother's paintings adorn the walls. The quilt on one of the beds was made by my mom with grandma's help. But perhaps my favorite is a needlework piece she made.

I remember the framed embroidery hanging in two of my childhood homes. It had a place of prominence hanging by a rocking chair in the living room or by the front entry. It always struck me. My mom would sit in a rocker just like the picture with my youngest siblings. I would ponder the simple verse and wonder about it. Did my grandma make it because it reminded her of my mom, her only daughter? As I grew older, I started to understand the message. I realized that such a simple verse has so much importance and meaning. My grandmother, herself a mother of six, did not make it because the figure reminded her of my mom. She made it hoping to remind my mom and her future generations that the job of a mother is amazing yet short-lived. She wanted us to remember that

Cleaning and scrubbing can wait 'til tomorrow...

for babies grow up we've learned to our sorrow

so quiet down cobwebs, dust go to sleep...I'm rocking my baby

and babies don't keep.

Mornings

I am a morning person. I wake early by nature. I love jumping out of bed and starting the day. I am married to a night person. He slowly lingers in bed until the last moment. He then rolls out cautiously. My children are a mix. They love getting up early to catch what the new day brings. They also love staying up late connecting with their papa who has been gone all day.

Recently I noticed that we were trying to be both morning and night people. It hasn't really been working. Days stretch on with much frustration and tears. Too little time for restoration of little bodies and minds. Too little time for husband and wife to be together. And too little time for me. In an attempt to honor everyone's needs, I noticed that I had forgotten my love of mornings and my need for quiet alone time. I had forgotten my husband's need for slow mornings and long nights.

I am hoping to find a better balance. I am starting with me and my attitude. Lately I have been setting an alarm to get up. I slide out of bed alone and enjoy the silence careful not to wake anyone. I need a few minutes alone to process my thoughts. I enjoy reading my email, catching up on my favorite blogs, showering, reading and knitting. It is a perfect start to my day. With just these few precious moments, I feel like a new person.

This photo has little to do with the post, but I love it. It is from our recent trip.

Pink Piggies

It is quiet in my home. The kiddos are sleeping, except for Eamon, who is reading Tiny Titans: The First Rule of Pet Club (we went to the library today). I can hear the clock in our bathroom ticking. I have a few minutes to spend at the computer uninterrupted. It was a slow night here as Dave is out of town for the evening. When he is gone we have a different rhythm. It doesn't happen often and for that we are thankful.

When it is just the four of us, it is slower for some reason. Tonight we ate an early dinner. Everyone talked to daddy on the phone. We watched a short movie. We read some books. We cuddled. They fell asleep. This happens every night, but tonight it was different. Our rhythm is different. I don't know how to explain it. When daddy is home, there is a different energy. They want to do more, show more, tell more. They miss him during the day and try to soak up as much as they can in the evening hours. When it is just us, they relax a bit knowing we have spent the day together.

Perhaps it is me. When Dave is home, he will absorb their stories, hugs and energy while I handle the evening home chores. When it is just the four of us, I tend to relax with them and take a bit more time for me. I don't worry about getting everything in. I leave the dishes in the sink and the floor unswept. There are toys strewn about the family room. Instead of cleaning up and organizing for another day, tonight I will paint my toenails a flashy pink. I will knit and watch John Adams. I will end up staying up later.

Sexy

Writers are sexy.  Not in the eye candy type of way, but in the ability to put words to paper.  They are sexy as they hone sentences into complex thoughts that elicit emotions and images.  The ability to write can be a gift as the ability to read the written word can transform an individual.  One is transported to another time and place with unique smells images and emotions.  Writers do this for their readers.

Recently I have been walking and listening.  Each morning I put on my headphones and venture forth by myself for a bit of time alone.  During these sojourns, I listen.  I listen to podcasts.  My favorite explores writers.  They are writers of the short story, and the podcast is from the New Yorker.

The short story is magical.  In just a few pages an entire drama unfolds.  Do you remember reading The Lottery?  If you cannot, please stop now and read it.  It is fantastic.  The author skillfully transports you and then shocks you at the end.  All within 30 minutes!  The words in a short story must matter.  There is no room for extra verbiage.  Each word gives meaning and adds to the whole.  The elements of style abound in a short story.  A good short story author skillfully weaves the tale leading the reader.  I love them.

So if you only have thirty minutes to spare, read or listen to a short story.  Hear the magic of an idea unfolding in a short space and marvel at the author's ability to create something with so few words.  I swear it is a treat.

No More Funk

I have been using a product called Funk Butter as deodorant for over a year. It works very well, but it can be pricey with shipping. I had heard of others making their own deodorant, so I decided to give it a try. My sister gave me a recipe, and it works great. It is so easy and cheap - equal parts baking soda and corn starch with enough coconut oil to make your desired consistency. I added a couple drops of tea tree oil as well. I really like it. I don't stink at all! It even stands up to rowing.

Curls??

According to my stylist, my hair has wave and CURL. Amazing what a few pregnancies and nursing can do to your hair.

Searching

In light of my recent reading of Affluenza and re-reading of Animal, Vegetable, Miracle, I am again searching and trying to define what I want from my life. This is an ongoing journey for me and one that D & I talk about quite a bit. How do I envision our lives as a family. What is important to me. I found the following list of "Priorities for American Consumers" in Affluenza (pg 195), and I think it hits on quite a few for me:

Transportation

1. Choose a place to live that reduces the need to drive.
2. Think twice before purchasing a second or third car
3. Chose a fuel efficient, low-polluting car.
4. Set concrete goals for reducing your travel
5. Whenever practical, walk, bicycle, or take public transportation

Food

1. Eat less meat.
2. Buy certified organic produce.

Household Operations

1. Choose your home carefully.
2. Reduce the environmental costs of heating and hot water.
3. Install efficient lighting and appliances
4. Choose and electricity supplied offering renewable energy.

I want to live somewhere close to family that has a diverse population, walkable/bikeable amenities nearby, solid public transportation, green spaces, university(ies) nearby, libraries, parks, museums, good local food. I want a home that is clean and orderly where stuff does not continue to invade every space of my being, where my family can play and enjoy one another, and where I have enough room in the yard for a garden which could sustain our family in produce. I want my husband to have a job that doesn't cause him sleepless nights, that he enjoys and looks forward to doing, that enhances our life but doesn't detract from it.

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Selsun Blue

I am not an audiophile. I love music, but I often don't know the lyrics, artist or name of the song. Not too long ago, I asked D why Neil Diamond was singing about dandruff shampoo. He looked at me in disbelief as he told me the song is "Song Sung Blue."

I recently found a new song to like. I heard it on the radio while driving with D and the kiddos. I asked him what "menicuous" was. This is the song. I love it. The words are hilariously horrid, but oh the beat...